Brett Kavanaugh is bland.
Trump's pick to replace Supreme Court Justice Anthony Kennedy has been condemned as an "enemy of the left," who will herald a Handmaid's Tale-type era of conservatism. A Yale publication found that he also had abhorrent eating habits in law school.
Aside from being named Brett, one of the blandest possible names you could chose for an innocent baby, Kavanaugh apparently had the palate of a human-shaped blob of unseasoned mashed potatoes while in college. The Yale Daily News, Kavanaugh's alma mater publication, looked into the judge's law school habits and found out that he is about as interesting as a sheet of blank paper.
According to Kavanaugh's then-roommate Kenneth Christmas, the judge is a "bland eater" who stuck to pasta with tomato sauce. Eating plain pasta with tomato sauce is totally normal, but the story also includes the egregious fact that Kavanaugh would eat his pasta with ketchup. KETCHUP!
Another roommate, Steve Hartmann, told the Yale Daily News that Kavanaugh stuck to ragu when he ate spaghetti. "He didn't want anything spicier than that," Hartmann said.
With what Christmas called "limited dance moves," when the group of friends went out for pizza, Kavanaugh would stick to plain cheese. Occasionally he'd branch out and go for a spicy topping that only the bravest of gourmands could tolerate: pepperoni.
The internet agreed that although Kavanaugh could have more scandalous skeletons in his closet, putting ketchup on pasta is an act only the worst of monsters could commit.
I thought “ketchup on salad” was the worst thing connected to ketchup but it turns out the worst thing is actually Brett Kavanaugh.
— Amanda Smith (@AmandaRTubbs) July 13, 2018
Obviously, people change. Kavanaugh's palate could have grown over the last 30 years — who knows, he may even eats bacon now!
At least he shares a love of ketchup with the president, whose steak preferences would make any chef cry. Trump allegedly enjoys his steak well done with a side of ketchup — a decision that 56 percent of voters disapprove of, according to Public Policy Polling.